| Sumi |
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| Below is one of Sumi's essays for her Indian School of Business application. We present the essay in its original form, with just cosmetic changes made to protect the author's identity. We then provide comments and suggestions, based on the advice available in Your MBA Game Plan. |
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| The question that she answers in this essay is: |
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| How do you define leadership? (200 words) |
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Leadership is a force that every human being inherits and exhibits. Not only are we impacted by it, but also we are all called upon to exercise it. Whether we are called upon to be involved in guiding young minds, leading a family, standing for what is right, organizing a dinner or a household chore, everyone has a leadership role to play. We are each thrust into many different leadership roles again and again, through our life.
Leadership is all but acceptance of responsibility, responsibility to persuade others to seek defined objectives enthusiastically. It is a role behavior that unites and stimulates followers towards particular objectives in particular environment. Leadership is not only faith and trust, beliefs and hopes but, living those values as a model and example for others to follow. It means raising the sights and holding the focus of those we lead such that they are empowered to reach their potentials. Leadership to transforms potential into reality.
True leadership is all about individual’s freedom, choice, accountability or responsibility. It is more of a balance between give and take relations. Just as the leader is to be serving and taking into account the ideas and needs of those they lead, those following that lead are also to be committed in the same way. And in the process the followers along with leaders practice core value system of self-reliance, discipline, respect, integrity, honesty and trust, thereby making way for a cohesive group where all are empowered. The strong presence of these core values also brings life to initiatives and transforms seemingly routine activities into programs that make a meaningful contribution to the individual and the society. |
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| Comments |
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While at first glance, this essay appears to be straightforward, it can often be difficult to provide succinct definitions for these types of attributes that are used in everyday conversations, but mean different things to different people. Admissions committees tend to view leadership as taking initiative, managing difficult situations and providing others with direction. For this essay, the writer should consider providing his/her definition and also providing one or two examples to help crystallize that definition in the minds of readers. |
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Overall, Sumi does a decent job of communicating her thoughts on leadership. She discusses the multiple facets of leadership and provides some examples. |
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At times however, the language she uses is a bit difficult to understand. For example, the first sentence of the second paragraph states that, "Leadership is all but acceptance of responsibility..." Certainly accepting responsibility is a major part of leadership, so we're not quite sure what she means by that. She should have someone read through the essay carefully looking for grammar and flow issues. |
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Additionally, Sumi has surpassed the word limit by more than 30%. She should consider cutting a large portion of the third paragraph, which is a bit redundant and starts to cloud her perspective on leadership. |
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